My Remarkable-Unremarkable Weekend - Part 1

So, this weekend was really nice. It was disgustingly hot, and various annoying things happened, but overall, it was really pleasant. So I've decided to do a six-part photo-journal chronicling my remarkable-unremarkable weekend. It all begins and ends with a sunset.



As we're rolling along, we enter the nasty-ass marshlands of New Jersey, and the train rumbles to a stop. Nothing to worry about, I figure, seeing as at least once a day on the NYC subway the trains rumble to a stop. I figure we'll be moving in just a minute. I look out the window and take another pic.


A couple minutes later the conductor comes on the loudspeaker and says the engine has completely shut down and that he had his engineers working on it and hopefully we'd be up and running in a couple minutes. Of course there are many loud groans on the train as well as many snarky, smart-ass comments from the small group of stock-brokers who'd met over beers at the bar and who had, of course, become instant BFF's and were ass-over-tea-kettle. I took another pic.


The conductor came back over the loud speaker and said there was no way the engine was going to get fixed, and that he'd radioed in to his supervisors back at Secaucus Junction and that they were sending out a rescue engine to tow us back to the station where they'd have "alternate equipment" waiting for us. I took another pic.


A half hour later the "rescue engine" arrived and took a good ten minutes to couple up to our train. The stock-brokers had by this point threatened to riot and to take hostages. They were calling it the e-train, because it'd get to its destination e-ventually. They thought they were hilarious.

We got to Salisbury Mills an hour after we were scheduled to arrive. I was cranky.

Vanessa's Rules by Which to Live: Rule #4

What to do when your immediate supervisor is a passive aggressive spawn of hell:

Pretend their subtly implied insults don't exist. Let them go right over your head. Just smile dumbly, nod, and go about your business. Not only will this make you look good to the Head Honcho, but it will infuriate your immediate supervisor, all while not once providing them any ammunition with which to either write you up or terminate you.

It won't be until after you've usurped their control of the office that they'll realize you're not a dim halfwit, but an evil genius.

Like, OMG!!!! (insert teeny bopper scream here)

When I was in the fourth grade, the New Kids on the Block were the bee's knees, baby. I had a crush on Donny, because he was the bad boy. It was 1989, and The Right Stuff was their hit du jour. I also had this obscenely large Joey button that must have been four inches across. I also had posters, a towel, a wash cloth and myriad different items of clothing. Unfortunately, by fifth grade, I was no longer allowed to like the New Kids (so said my peers), as Vanilla Ice's Ice Ice Baby was not the music everyone was supposed to like. I never liked it. Turns out I was RIGHT. And all of them were WRONG. HA HA!! Vindication!

Back then the New Kids were so much better. And they'd made it, you know? You can tell you've made it because Weird Al parodied The Right Stuff in his song The White Stuff. It was about Oreo cookies. It went thusly:

The first one was a sweet one/second one was a blast/soon I finished off the bag/ate them up real fast/You can see them in my teeth/tell it when I talk/had so many my pancreas just went into shock.

It was genius, I tell you.

Anyhoo, I just got an email from ticket master. The New Kids on the Block, now calling themselves NKOTB, are playing Madison Square Garden in the end of October. I may not fit into that ratty old jumper from when I was 9, but dammit if I can score tickets, I will wear that Joey button.

Tickets go on sale on 6/9/08. Buy them here. You know you want to. That inner fourth grader is demanding it. You could wear a bowler and a smiley face shirt. And acid-washed jeans with holes in the knees. You'd be totally tubular.

Unique Art

Here is some unique art I found out and about on the interweb.

This guy's name is Brad Downey. He does surreal urban installation art.


This is 3-D sidewalk chalk art. I'm not sure who the artist is, but I really like it.



And these are stuffed roadkill. They use special materials to make them feel realistic. They come in a see-through bodybag with a toe-tag. From RoadKillToys.

Fun stuff, right?

More doodles and studies

I said I'd post more of my drawings. Here are some studies I did.

10 Princess Points to whomsoever can name the artist that I used as my original. (Disclaimer: I practice by copying the masters).



Study of a female torso



This is a sculpture at the Met. I don't remember what it's called, but I really liked it.



10 more Princess Points to whomsoever can name the artist I used as my guide. He's popular with watercolor fairy portraits. I did this one in crayola crayons.




This is a portrait I did of my late mother-in-law before she passed. I miss her.

This made me snicker

Male Reproductive Medicine, where I work, is a pioneering facility where we're constantly developing new ways to treat male infertility. One of the main causes of male infertility is what's known as a varicocele. Those varicose vein women get the the backs of their legs? Men get those in their scrotums. The increased blood flow to the testicles raises testicular temperature. The whole point of keeping the testes in the scrotum is to keep them lower than body temperature. Having varicoceles defeats that purpose. My boss developed what's known as microsurgical varicocelectomy. It's the best way to get rid of varicoceles; it has the least complication rate and the least chance of recurrance

Of course training to perform microsurgical varicocelectomy isn't done directly on humans; you can only operate on humans once you've mastered the technique. For the past twenty five years or so, training has been done on rats. However, our office has recently developed a varicocele model in mice. Mice are better than rats. They just are.

So today they are operating on mice. I was emailed the itinerary for the operation. It amused me, so I thought I'd share it.


1. Anesthetize mouse.
2. Weigh mouse.
3. Measure ambient temperature.
4. Measure mouse rectal temperature.
5. Measure mouse intratesticular temperature with needle probe for both testes.
6. Shave mouse.
7. Laparotomy, expose previous surgery site.
8. Inspect for varicocele induction.
9. Measure testicular vein diameter.
10. Deliver testes.
11. Measure testicular dimensions.
12. Photograph and videotape representative mouse.
13. Cardiac puncture to collect blood sample.
14. Harvest testes.
15. Freeze blood and testes specimen.

My favorite: "Shave Mouse".

It made me snicker.

A Wee Bit 'O Doodle

I got new crayons! mmm...crayons. See what I drew? I'm not a very good illustrator. I can do pencil, I can do paint. Illustrations, not so much. But man, do I love crayons. Maybe I'll scan some of my better crayon drawings tomorrow. Gotta see if I can find that particular sketch book tonight.