Best album review EVER

I'm bored, all right?

Anyhoo, List of the Day posted Cracked.com's list of the most unnecessary best hits albums ever along with their reviews of each respective album. This was, by far, my favorite:

Soulless, borderline-offensive-to-the-genre blues songs performed by rich white men are an art form loved by dozens. Bruce Willis (or Bruno, as he's called by graying douchebags who prefer their blues served with a heaping side of financially stable) actually has FOUR best-of collections. Ultimately, we settled on "The Master Series" because of the awesome title and super gay album cover.

On unnecessary testing and amnesia

Yesterday, I left work early in order to undergo an upper endoscopy. Ever since my gall bladder surgery two years ago, I've progressively had worse and worse reflux and regurgitation, which, while not as nasty as the nausea caused by my gall bladder, isn't very pleasant. I went to my GI doctor who decided to do this test on me to see if I had an ulcer or some sort of stricture that was making me sick.
Well, I got there and was brought in to the room. An IV was placed in my arm in order to administer the MAC (managed anesthesia care - where they knock you out but not enough to require an endotracheal tube), and I was informed that, prior to their putting me to sleep, I'd have to gargle an awful tasting anesthetic in order to supress my gag reflex. Unfortunately, I'm extremely sensative to nasty tastes, and therefore broke out in a cold sweat when the anesthesiologist told me this.
The doctors let me stew there with this news for a while, during which time I became increasingly nervous. Finally, when it was time to take the nasty crap, it wasn't too bad. Kind of tastes like liquid steroids.

That done, I was put blissfully to sleep, had a nice little thirty minute nap, and then woke up feeling a bit drunk.

I went back into the doctor's office afterward to discuss his findings. Apparently, before they'd moved me into the recovery room, we'd already discussed everything because I had professed my lucidity; I remember none of this. All in all, there's nothing wrong with my stomach or my esophagus, and I'm doing a-okay. Although I do have some stomach polyps, as you can see above, but they're apparently not as much of a harbinger of danger as colon polyps are.

So woozy was I that it didn't occur to me until I got home that, since the test was negative, we still don't know what's causing my reflux or regurgitation.

The moral of the story? I dunno...I just wanted to post pics of my innards on my blog. Enjoy!

hehe...he used a natural *log*

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, it is time for another witty cartoon from xkcd, this one MATH - THEMED!!! Hooray for math!!!

Naturally (that's a math reference), my favorite position is the last square.

Honestly, though, I think 34 would have been funnier if it had been 42 (said in an all-knowing, all powerful computer voice)


...


holy crap I'm a geek

Happy Tummy

Yes, I know it's after sundown, and I'm being naughty for using a computer, but I wanted to share with you my marrow bones. I had posted a few days ago about how much I was craving bone marrow, so tonight, on Yom Kippur eve, I made it. SOOOO YUMMY.

First, I gave the bones an overnight water bath in the fridge, changing the water once.

Next, I laid out the bones on a foil-lined sheet and waited for the oven to reach 450.

I put parbaked sourdough rolls on another sheet to bake alongside the bones.

While the bones and bread were cooking, I sauteed in olive oil a shallot and one clove of garlic with lemon juice to spread on the bread.

This is the oil when done.

And here's the finished product. It was sooooo yummy, even though BF was too scared to try it. I admit, it's not for everyone, but right now my tummy is so happy.

Now, no more eating till tomorrow night. G-d will forgive this blog post, I'm sure.

Tuesday Afternoon Craving

Come procrastinate with me

I'd posted a while back on one of the ways I hope I don't die. Well, in today's random browsing, I came across some fun quizzes, one of which was to find out how long I, myself, would survive in the vacuum of space. And you know what? More than a minute.



The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy also addresses this problem, but I feel confident in the fact that the infinite improbability drive will find me long before I explode, even if I am turned into a yarn person.

Furthermore, I have noticed that my blog has slowly, but inexorably, turning into a geek blog. Why is this? Well, I suppose I'm a geek. Proudly not a dweeb, but definitely a geek. See, this here quiz says so:

78% Geek

Yes, I'm spending way too much time on that website. Look: this is how much my dead body would be worth!

$4715.00The Cadaver Calculator - Find out how much your body is worth.

All right, I suppose I should do SOMEthing.

Gurgh.

Speaking of favorite poems...

For my own literary enjoyment, here are a couple more of my favorite poems.

Tell all the Truth

Tell all the truth but tell it slant,

Success in circuit lies,

Too bright for our infirm delight

The truth's superb surprise;

As lightning to the children eased

With explanation kind,

The truth must dazzle gradually

Or every man be blind.

- Emily Dickinson

Annabel Lee (this poem is best recited out loud)

It was many and many a year ago,
In a kingdom by the sea
That a maiden there lived whom you may know
By the name of Annabel Lee--
And this maiden she lived with no other thought
Than to love and be loved by me.
I was a child and she was a child,
In this kingdom by the sea,
But we loved with a love that was more than love--
I and my Annabel Lee--
With a love that the winged seraphs of heaven
Coveted her and me.
And this was the reason that, long ago,
In this kingdom by the sea,
A wind blew out of a cloud, chilling
My beautiful Annabel Lee;
So that her highborn kinsmen came
And bore her away from me,
To shut her up in a sepulchre
In this kingdom by the sea.
The angels, not half so happy in heaven,
Went envying her and me--
Yes!--that was the reason (as all men know,
In this kingdom by the sea)
That the wind came out of the cloud by night,
Chilling and killing my Annabel Lee.
But our love it was stronger by far than the love
Of those who were older than we--
Of many far wiser than we--
And neither the angels in heaven above,
Nor the demons down under the sea,
Can ever dissever my soul from the soul
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee:
For the moon never beams, without bringing me dreams
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee:
And the stars never rise, but I feel the bright eyes
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee:
And so, all the night-tide, I lay down by the side
Of my darling--my darling--my life and my bride,
In the sepulchre there by the sea--
In her tomb by the sounding sea.

- Edgar Allan Poe

Stopping By the Woods on a Snowy Evening

Whose woods these are I think I know.
His house is in the village though;
He will not see me stopping here
To watch his woods fill up with snow.
My little horse must think it queer
To stop without a farmhouse near
Between the woods and frozen lake
The darkest evening of the year.
He gives his harness bells a shake
To ask if there is some mistake.
The only other sound’s the sweep
Of easy wind and downy flake.
The woods are lovely, dark and deep.
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.

- Robert Frost